Hello everyone,
This week we read up to pg 73, "the Buddha goes further..." We discussed the First Noble Truth and began The Second Noble Truth in terms of understanding how they relate to our recovery.
This week's discussion question comes from pg 72 where Kevin says "the reason we struggle isn't because of the way things are, but because of our relationship to the way things are."
Can you relate to this and share an example with us?
For me, it is extremely relevant right now. Kevin goes on to say "If I can accept things as they are, I don't struggle, even if things are difficult." Well, things are difficult for me right now, as it's been only a little more than a month since my long-term boyfriend and an old friend passed away. I miss them both every day, and I am grieving, but it is different for me than past losses where it was all about me.
When I was using/drinking, even someone's death was more about my pain and my loss than the death itself. It doesn't mean that I don't feel the loss and grief, but it does mean that I don't spend all my time wishing that things were different and living in regret for what could have been or what we missed doing etc etc. I try to accept things as they are, the reality of the situation, as well as my feelings and loss, but without making it a catastrophe that happened to me. It is the First Noble Truth, people age and die and I can grieve them without giving up on my own life. I have been able to continue showing up for my own life thanks to my greater understanding of these truths and the spiritual journey of recovery that I am on. That way I can use my feelings to be of benefit to others dealing with grief and loss instead of sinking into a dark hole of despair.
What about you? How has your relationship to the way things are increased or decreased your suffering?
